Any funny cooking stories?

[crunchies0313]

My mom was not a cook at all. She was the Queen of the Microwave. Therefore I have had no one to really learn from (Nanny doesn't have recipies to share, she says she just mixes stuff together!!) I recently tried to make my boyfriend and myself Lemon Pepper chicken for dinner. WOW! Couldn't have gone any worse.
First off... I obviously can't read or I would have seen that the chicken I picked up was in strips and I needed breasts. I tried to not get frustrated and told myself it wouldn't make a difference. I then had to marinate for at least 8 hrs. I let it sit for maybe 2 hrs. I did let it cook all the way but it tasted like pure lemonade.
I then tried asparagus. I had never eaten it before, but I am up for anything. I thought it tasted ok, my boyfriend hated it (I think because he doesn't like green).
So since the chicken was bad, he didnt like the green veggies, that left him with bread. I felt bad and made him a PB & honey sandwhich.
I guess you learn from your mistakes, but I think that after so many no one will even eat the food anymore!!

Anyone have an interesting cooking story!!

[Weiser]

My cookies are always an interesting cooking story! So, I gave up! Now I buy the dough, and sometimes I even cook it before I eat it! I think I'll have a spoonful right now! :grin:

[Kathy]

Aww, I bet he was happy with his bread and pb and honey!

I have plenty of funny cooking stories. Once I made a lasagna that was a quickie recipe. Its the kind that you don't cook the noodles ahead of time. I loaded the sauce with veggies and no meat. Lots of cheeses....

My husband's parents were visiting and this was our dinner with a lovely green salad. Oh, it was yummy and everything was fine with everyone eating...(except my son who rarely ate anything but PB until he got much older....but still is picky!) until my husband declared to his mom..."Isn't it good? And there's no meat and she didn't cook the noodles!"

Everyone dropped their forks...and hardly finished the meal. Apparently lasagna needs meat and cooked noodles.

:bliss:

[Kate]

I once tried to cook a special chicken for someone special to me. It was one of those full chickens! Well, I followed the recipe and it was pretty basic. Just salt, pepper and some lemon. I was really hoping that my susie homemaker mad skills would shine. Well, needless to say, the chicken cooked, but not as long as it should. I was slightly rushed by the other person because he was so hungry and I underestimated how long it would take to cook and prepare! My rosemary potatoes were still a little crunchy. Luckily the dessert was yummy, so I filled up on that. He still had seconds! :eek:

So lesson learned: when making a special dinner, cook it one time for trial. ;) Or otherwise just stop by Albertson's and pick up an already cooked chicken. :chicken:

Crunchie, I once bought split breast chicken with the bones still in it. I had NO IDEA how to remove the bones. Needless to say, all that chicken got thrown away. haha

[Canadian Girl]

I'm honestly not the cook around my place: DH is, fortunately.

I remember this one day, about 3 years ago, when I was preparing Chicken Burgers for the family. Easy to do: put the patties on a cookie sheet, bake the patties in the oven for 10 minutes, turn them over, bake them for another 10 minutes.. then broil the burger buns. Piece of cake!!!

Well, for me, it wasn't so easy: first, instead of putting the patties on a cookie sheet, I put them on this pizza pan we like. The Pizza pan has a handle. It is metal. When I took the pizza pan out to turn the patties, I burned my hand on the handle. I remember, vividly, the pain. Then, I forgot about the handle being hot and held it with my bare fingers: burnt 4 of my 5 fingers. Since I'd cut the other one while slicing tomatoes that morning, I was in pretty bad shape :lol:

My DH then kicked me out of the kitchen. There's got to be an easier way to get out of cooking dutie!!!!

[Tracy]

We still laugh about it 14 years later. I was not taught to cook much growing up. My mom always did that. Well, after my hubby and I got married we decided to make blueberry pancakes. We made the batter and then stirred in blueberry pie filling. Not only did the pancakes not rise they kind of looked like frisbies. That was shortly before I learned the hard way you can't heat anything in a metal pan in the microwave. :o

[Charger]

Well, there was the time I accidentally bought frozen rasberries when I was making strawberry shortcake... and the time that I brought a dessert cake to a friend's for dinner.....and someone bit into a bolt that had fallen out of the mixer :eek: and another time at a family gathering the dessert I made from a pudding mix somehow tasted like soap :confused: . Guess I shouldn't be in charge of desserts. The most memorable cooking adventure was the very first time that hubby (the real cook in the family) made his famous blackened fish. He carefully followed Paul Prudohme's receipe ignoring the part about "be sure to cook this outside". There was so much smoke in the house we were crawling around on our hands and knees and the smoke alarms were going off!! :o Needless to say he moved production outside, where he has cooked it ever since!

[smalltowngal]

Kate gave me a wonderful recipe for a pumpkin spice cake that tastes yummy when it is made correctly. I went to the store and grabbed all the ingredients...enough to make 2 cakes. Well, I was making one for my boyfriend to take to work with him for Thanksgiving. I was really nervous because I had never made it before so instead of sending the whole cake i decided to cut it into slices and try it out. We ate some and it tasted like bananas. :banana: I could not figure out what in the world I had done to make a pumpkin spice cake taste like bananas until I looked in the trash and realized that I had used banana pudding rather than vanilla. I just grabbed 2 puddings only looking at the first one labeled vanilla. Needless to say, he had nothing to take with him on food day. :(

[txgurl]

I have a couple of funny ones, but this one comes to mind.

We went on a trip down to the beach in Corpus Christi, Tx when our DD's were very young, and brought grandma and grandpa along. We stayed in a small hotel on the beach for a few days. Grandma who didn't like leaving her purse out in the open when we went down by the beach, decided to hide it in the oven. :brightide: We didn't remember about the purse being there till the next morning while preheating the oven for some biscuits! :eek: Ugh! smoked purse!

[YellowRoseTex]

I often hear stories of how my grandma was not a cook. She would open a can of tomato soup, boil some noodles and say it was spaghetti. My mom however, learned to cook and I watched her since I was a little kid and really enjoy it. I have had some mishaps along the way.

I was making a new recipe for sweet potatoes for Thanksgiving dinner. The recipe calls for the potatoes to be mashed and you put marshmallows on top. I did that, put them in the oven and than forgot about them. :eek: The marshmallows were burnt to a crisp. I scraped off them off, put some new ones on and put them back in the oven. Whoops! Forgot again. For the third time, I turned the oven down to 400 and tried again. I also set the timer! Dh still laughs at me. Everytime I make those sweet potatoes he says "don't burn the marshmallows".

[Tracy]

Reading a few of these it reminds me of a funny thing I accidentally did. I made broccoli cheese potato soup which requires parsley. My husband sat down at a first huge bowl and was on his second when I finally got time to sit down and eat. I was spooning it around trying to get it to cool and I said "Gee, I don't remember putting this much pepper in the soup." After some investigation I realized that my parsley was buggy (I had it longer than I thought) my husband by that time had eaten two bowls. I am laughing even as I am typing this. :eek:

[Kathy]

:rofl: Tracy, that is so funny. I guess your husband got extra protein with that meal!

[Ms Big Butt]

I was up very late one nite preparing for a summer bbq party the next day. I was waiting for the timer on the baked beans to go off, then I would be able to go to bed. Once the timer went off, I had to bring the big glass dish of hot baked beans out to the garage and store in the refrigerator. So, I don the oven mitts, and careful not to spill, make my way to the garage. I am maneuvering the door with my ELBOW, then will have to go down two steps into the garage.

Of course, I lost my grip, and the glass dish hit the cement floor in garage, broken glass and hot beans go skidding across the floor. I didn’t get spilled on or hurt, but it seemed like a good time to sit on the garage steps and cry over the loss of my favorite pyrex dish.

My hubby was sleeping soundly, and came running out to see what the commotion was. After assessing the situation, he proceeded to take charge of clean-up. He opened the big overhead garage door (lights on!!), brought in the trash can from the side yard, and got out the snow shovel.

Any nosy neighbors who peeked out their window that nite saw my hubby in his TIDY WHITES in the spotlighted garage, scooping baked beans into a trash can. hehe

[wingriderprincess]

I just had an image of a man in his underware shoveling beans ;)

My dad was a hunter but he didn't hunt duck or geese. He did bring home rabbit, quail, ect. , and my mom fried it. It was sooooo good. A few weeks after I was married, my DH brought home some duck and a goose he had got. Being the good wife, I cooked it for him and some of our friends. I fried it!! :D For those of you that don't know, it needs to be baked or slow cooked or it's like shoe leather. My dad laughed at the story until the day he past on. My DH still tells his buddies to , "bring it on over, my wife can fry it up for you"! Smart aleck..... *outtahere

[Sophiebelle]

My DH and I did a standing rib roast a few years ago, for my Mom and her husband. It was beautifully done and ready to take out of the oven. We opened up the oven and slid out the rack to take the roast off and it slid off the rack onto the floor. Our dog was right there and got a few munches in! It was still good tho......

[MalteseJane]

When I got married I did not know how to cook. So my first red cabbage dish was over salted because raw it looked like a huge puddle and I salted for a huge puddle not thinking that the puddle will shrink from cooking.
First time I cooked rice, I made enough to feed at least 20 people and we were maybe 6.
Then my husband tells me he likes cayenne pepper. I make soup and add cayenne pepper (not the powder, dried cayenne pieces). To make sure it's not going to be too spicy, I taste the soup. Nope not too spicy. Add some more tiny pieces. Taste. Still not hot. More little pieces. When we finally had dinner, I could not eat it. It was fire in my mouth. I don't know how my husband managed to get it down. For spicy, it sure was spicy.

[SouthDakotaSherry]

I am a pretty good cook and used to love to have dinner parties. I invited 12 friends over for turkey dinner. I had a soup course and a salad course, but we were waiting for the turkey to finish cooking. Then we discovered that the oven had quit working. I have a 24 lb. bird partly cooked in the oven and all these people dressed up and sitting at my dining table! After nearly hyper-ventilating, we ordered pizza and have laughed for years about it. Pizza went well with chocolate truffle cake!

[pednurse]

These stories are so funny! I have managed to bungle several dishes in my time (DH is the better cook!). My favorite story is the first time I ever microwaved popcorn. I was a teen babysitting and the mom had left a bag of microwave popcorn for me to make for the kids. Well, I put it in and left it too long......popcorn on fire! *omg* Smoke coming out of the microwave! Well, I got the kitchen aired out and found some nice air freshener spray and used it liberally. When the mom came home she commented on how yummy the kitchen smelled (it was cinnamon air freshener!) and wanted to know what I delicious thing I had baked! :blush:
My dad is even worse than I am......just after we got our first microwave, my mom was in the hospital. That meant Dad was in charge of meals. Well, he decided one night that we needed to have baked beans for supper......and he wanted to make them in the new microwave. Well, he didn't have a clue what he was doing and set the microwave for the amount of time that the beans would have cooked in the regular oven. Nothing like little charred pebbles for supper! He still hasn't lived that one down......

[Texas-Ali]

When I first moved out on my own, I had my own kitchen, I was 18 and I just knew I had everything under control. My boyfriend and his mother were coming for dinner. I love that woman to pieces.. even now, 22 years later we still keep in touch.

I had planned on making fried chicken, mashed potoes, green beans and home made cookies. No one ever told me that even if the chicken is beautiful on the outside, it was still pretty nasty on the inside. And the oven was broken, found out the hard way.. yes that day, it only broiled, did not bake. So not only did I serve bloody chicken and very lumpy potatoes, the only way to make the cookies was to broil them on one side, flip them with a pancake turner and broil the other side.

His mother helped me get the chicken off the table and fix it, but of course we had to keep stopping what ever we were doing to flip the cookies. We did evenutally eat... just took a while.

[crunchies0313]

I can say I successfully made Manicotti!!!!!!!! Boyfriend loved it!! He had some recommendations, but I am willing to try anything now that I have the basic idea down!!

[DieNarrin]

My favorite actually happened to my sister. On her son's first birthday party she made this gorgeous chocolate cake with a wonderful ganache frosting. So simple and yet so yummy.

So good in fact she went into the kitchen and found the cat helping himself to part of it. My sister carefully trimmed the area and took some fresh flowers and hid the mangled portion of the cake.

Everyone thought the cake was beautiful and kept complementing her and the decorations.

Finally my Dad couldn't stand it any more and he told a few of us that the "Gato got to the geateau!" He never could pass up a good pun!

For some reason my sister still doesn't think that story is funny and my nephew is 14.

[mommysescape]

Duh
I love this. I guess I am not the only clutz in the world. I had a pampered chef party. My first party. I decided to do a taco ring and a cookie pizza. They were easy recipes. I put too much water in the ground beef taco mix and it was runny. Not too funny I know.

I put the refrigerated cookie dough onto the pizza pan and it didn't look like enough, so I added half another pack. When everyone arrived it smelled like burnt cookies. I knew it didn't have time to completely bake, so I opened the oven door and I had cookie dough all over the oven. The guests had come to see a cooking demonstration and they saw a cooking disaster. The show turned out O.K. I sold a few items.

[ester 6" tall]

Years ago, I tried making chicken soup. As a life long lover of chicken soup, I figured that I could make it just like that. WRONG! I started making the stock from the chicken. Once I removed the bones etc, I added all the ingredient that I knew to be in chicken soup. Cooked it for a while. Finally got to taste it. *omg* It was terrible. I didn't want to waste the ingredients just because the broth part tasted terrible, so I turned it into a new family favorite. I strained the soup, was left with the noodles, veggies and chicken. To that I added some cheese and put it in the mic to melt the cheese. Necessity is the mother of invention. It was fabulous. I have now taken this new thing and changed some of the veggies and added different cheeses, but it is always welcomed at dinner time.
BTW, I tried to make the soup again (you would have thought I learned my lesson last time). Same result. So I am making a promise to everyone alive. I will never make chicken soup from scratch again! :rofl:

[Mykhal Jaems]

Last winter DH decided he was going to make a gourmet meal for me. Since he doesn't use recipes they are usually one of a kind.

He fried up some boneless skinless chicken breast with alot of seasonings. They were starting to smell very good when all of a sudden I smelled starch. Not too long after that DH walked out of the kitchen, sat on the couch, turned on the tv and told me supper was ready. I asked him if he was going to have any and he said he wasn't all that hungry but I should try it and tell him what I thought of it. Sitting on the stove was a brownish colored gravy with chicken floating in it. I tasted it and it tasted weird, then I was hit with a really nasty after taste. Turns out he added lemon and orange zest. When it didn't taste all that great he thought he could mask it with canned pork gravy. The dog didn't even eat it and she eats everything, including stuff out of the litter box!

[GirlyGirl]

Thank you, Ladies! I don't have any cooking stories...I hate to cook and I leave that pleasure to my DH. But your stories have given me some good belly laughs!