sister in law from Mars

[wingriderprincess]

I have a sister-in-law who is always strirring the pot. It doesn't matter if it's between family members or strangers. If we go out to eat, she complains to the manager about the food and gets a free dinner or we go to a store and she thinks an employee was rude... what-ever... she is always causing trouble. On the other hand, she will do anything for anybody, and is always giving people stuff so everyone talks about how "giving" she is. :rolleyes: I actually have a special ring for her on my cell phone ( a ding dong :D ) so I will know it's her and can answer only if I choose to. Her petty complaints are driving me crazy! Her most recent has ticked off the in-laws so now I'm hearing about it from both sides. I wanna run away. Does anyone have a deserted island I can live on until this blows over? How do you all cope with family squabbles?

[Kate]

I have a sister-in-law who is always strirring the pot. It doesn't matter if it's between family members or strangers. If we go out to eat, she complains to the manager about the food and gets a free dinner or we go to a store and she thinks an employee was rude... what-ever... she is always causing trouble. On the other hand, she will do anything for anybody, and is always giving people stuff so everyone talks about how "giving" she is. :rolleyes: I actually have a special ring for her on my cell phone ( a ding dong :D ) so I will know it's her and can answer only if I choose to. Her petty complaints are driving me crazy! Her most recent has ticked off the in-laws so now I'm hearing about it from both sides. I wanna run away. Does anyone have a deserted island I can live on until this blows over? How do you all cope with family squabbles?

I have to say that it's funny that you have given her a special ring tone on your phone. :rofl: I haven't had to deal with all the lovely things that you mentioned, but hang in there. I'm sure other ladies with in-law wisdom will post soon!

[crunchies0313]

I actually have a brother in law that thinks hes right all the time. Its hard cause I love my sister and hanging out with her... but it can get so annoying. I dont argue with him anymore...I just agree and know in my mind.. HES WRONG. I deal with him because he is now a part of my family and I do love him..hes just difficult. My little sister just tells him like it is...he just argues back. If I were you jsut keep in mind that this lady makes your brother happy. And as long as you have the ringer changed, hopefully it will help! Just try to ignore it, I know its difficult, but that is the way she is and I doubt she will change!! Does your brother realize what she does? Has anyone said anything? I'm sorry that you have to deal with that everytime you go out...just keep in mind your family!!

[Ms Big Butt]

Dear wingriderprincess:

Apparently we are related!! Please wear a nametag with your posting name at our next family reunion, so we can dish about our SIL from Mars ;)

[spasmo]

Sweetie, you are describing a bunch of my inlaws (at least to a LARGE extent). I have gone to therapy to learn some coping strategies because it was just driving me stark raving NUTS! It was so petty and full of back biting. All the DRAMA was getting to me. And the fact that they seem to love and thrive on the drama is just plain twisted! I have to say that I do try to avoid situations that I know will make me crazy... I minimize exposure from goofiness.

My therapist taught me to have five phrases ready whenever I was going to be around "the family" that I could use whenever they started on a toxic topic that they were going to try and draw me into. Some of my favorites are "that must be so hard for them", "I bet they will need our support as they work through that", and "what an interesting thing to say". When they try to get me to take sides I usually just don't engage... if I do get involved I try and be as honest as I can be with both sides (and thus not popular with either) and encourage them to talk to each other (instead of me).

[Autumn Moon]

I don't have an in-law that is like that but I do have a co-worker that is like that.
Whenever she opens her mouth about something I always ask her - so what would you do to make it better or What would you do in that situation?
Autumn

[hypertyper]

I have some in-laws just like yours. I'm sure there are millions of us. There are two of them could probably win awards for drama and outrageous lying. In our case, it was usually based on wanting attention and on competition with others. I learned to simply not trust any of them and keep my distance. It's tough, but certainly you are not alone!!!

[GirlyGirl]

Wow. We all are from the same family! I have a SIL that sometimes makes me want to crawl under the table. She is loud and very opinionated. I sometime feel like I need to go around behind her and apologize to everybody! But, I love her to death. She would do anything for me.
And, Crunchies...Your BIL knows everything too?! My BIL has always been told how smart he is...and he is very intelligent...too bad he has no drive or ambition. He just sits a round playing online games and smoking his pot...and he wonders why he has no girlfriend and he's gaining weight. :)

[Mykhal Jaems]

I had an aunt like that. My uncle and her got a divorce, so she's not in contact with the family any more, whew!

It was before caller ID and before we got an answering machine (when we got one it was to screen HER calls) and my Mom would always keep something on the stove, usually an empty pot, so she could tell Kathy that she had something on the stove she had to go. After a while my aunt caught on and would write letters. They were so long that she would have to pay extra postage b/c they were more like novels.

I do also work with someone like that, I avoid her as much as possible, and I only say positive things around her so she can't suck me into her latest drama.

I don't really have any words of wisdom, but I do send my sympathy.

Hugs,

[TarHeelMom]

My sister in law sounds just like yours. I have been married 29 years and look at my caller ID before I answer the phone. And when I do have to be around her ( at family gatherings and such) I try to sit across the room from her so I dont get caught up in her quabbles. Mine gets worse with time instead of better, so if you find a deserted island let me know, I want to go with you (HAHA)!!!!!!

[wingriderprincess]

I think that deserted island is going to have to turn into another planet :( Things were pretty quiet until last week. She wasn't having any fun I guess so she started stirring the pot again. Part of me wants to get a poster board and write all her sins and dirty laundry on it and hang it from the town square so she can see how she makes others feel. The adult in me is keeping her mouth shut.... so far

:p