Giving Financial Help To Grown Kids ??

[LuvMaui]

Should we help pay our adult kids bills? Should we be a financial safety net? How about desperate times when the frig is empty, the gas tank is dry and payday is a week away?

If and when is it OK to a loan money or give money to our adult Kids? :confused:

25 years ago when I was a divorced Mom, My Mom would help us out when times were desperate. She kept a little black notebook that listed every penny I borrowed and every penny I paid back. It took me a long time to fully pay back my Mom. It also created a wall between us... that wall was made of money. I did learn a lesson from it... I WILL NEVER LOAN MONEY TO MY KIDS!! IF I CAN'T AFFORD TO JUST GIVE IT TO THEM .... I JUST SAY SORRY I DON'T HAVE IT ;)

[jcme]

It depends what they need the money for and how they got into the situation of needing financial help. It also depends on if the parent can afford to help or not.

If I answer the question "Should we be a financial safety net?" my response would be a resounding no. To me this implies parents bailing out children who know that they will always have a saftey net. In this case why should the kids worry about spending their money responsibly when they know they will never truly be broke because their parents will step in.

That being said, if a financially responsible child comes upon hard times, if the parents have the money to help I think they should.

Loan or gift would depend on the situation, what the money was needed for and people involved.

Take care

[100792]

My opinion is no. I have been married for 20 years and we have never asked either parent for any help. Luckily we have always had good jobs/careers and both of us budget quite well.

My parents loan money to my sister often and it infuriates me as my mom then complains about not being paid back. In my mind I am thinking, would be nice if you give me $1,000 at a time. And, it is not my fault she got herself into that situation.

My inlaws loan money to their kids (7 of the 8) and same as my parents, complain when they do not get paid back. Again, I am thinking woud be nice if you would give me some. What is even worse for them is they CAN NOT afford to give any money out.

I will admit my DS is 15 and I have not been put in that situation. I feel that we have shown DS enough budgeting stuff that he should be ok.