Bambi5
02-15-2009, 08:52 AM
Hi,
Iam new on here so I hope Iam posting in the right area ...prayers and wisdom is what I need .....I feel how can I go on in this so called marriage of 33yrs. a marriage where there has never been a good relationship and when I think back I see where i survived only by the grace of God and His strength ....today I feel like I cannot go on anymore my life looks hopeless ...future bleak....and all I have done is failed ....my children have scars from all the hurts even tho they are grown excepts for one still at home .....if I try to express my feelings we only go into a deep agrument and the hurts get deeper and I say to myself I will never again try to talk and try to share my heart ....we have nothing spiritual,physical,emotional,financial or mental together....I long for a connection and have for 33yrs...rejection is the name of the game ......when we go to church all looks well to others but inside my heart the pain is growing along with that comes feelings of anger,resentment ,hopelessness,and depression,,,,,I have suggested counselling for us and he says absolutely NO...plus we go to a church who says No one needs counselling the Bible is the anwser to problems ....which I know but I beleive people sometimes need biblical counselers to help them along.....I could go on and on .....my life really feels doom right now and no one to share with so its really lonely......the pastor says if we don't have joy or are depressed we probably aren't saved....??? He says if marriages are failing its usually the wifes fault.....I guess I feel done and shattered......
Iam new on here so I hope Iam posting in the right area ...prayers and wisdom is what I need .....I feel how can I go on in this so called marriage of 33yrs. a marriage where there has never been a good relationship and when I think back I see where i survived only by the grace of God and His strength ....today I feel like I cannot go on anymore my life looks hopeless ...future bleak....and all I have done is failed ....my children have scars from all the hurts even tho they are grown excepts for one still at home .....if I try to express my feelings we only go into a deep agrument and the hurts get deeper and I say to myself I will never again try to talk and try to share my heart ....we have nothing spiritual,physical,emotional,financial or mental together....I long for a connection and have for 33yrs...rejection is the name of the game ......when we go to church all looks well to others but inside my heart the pain is growing along with that comes feelings of anger,resentment ,hopelessness,and depression,,,,,I have suggested counselling for us and he says absolutely NO...plus we go to a church who says No one needs counselling the Bible is the anwser to problems ....which I know but I beleive people sometimes need biblical counselers to help them along.....I could go on and on .....my life really feels doom right now and no one to share with so its really lonely......the pastor says if we don't have joy or are depressed we probably aren't saved....??? He says if marriages are failing its usually the wifes fault.....I guess I feel done and shattered......