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No Small Loss
No matter what kind of friend is lost, the death of a loved one is a difficult challenge. Whether it was a cat, dog, horse, or goldfish, recognize how significant your loss is personally, and allow yourself to grieve. Give yourself time to heal, and be understanding with others to whom the pet was special.
Sometimes the death of a pet is more devastating than that of a relative or acquaintance. A profound closeness develops between people and animals, very much different than what exists between people. One may mourn the loss of the intimate companionship, the acts of caring for a dependent creature, the animal's unique personality, and his or her constant presence. Should you find anyone, even yourself, belittling the feelings of loss by implying or saying, “it was only a bird,” take the opportunity to explain what you miss about your special pet.
Memories, Not Guilt
Sometimes the circumstances of a pet's life or death pain the owner with feelings of guilt. If the death was preventable, the animal's living environment was less than ideal, more complaints than praises tended to be voiced concerning the animal, or even if the pet lived to a ripe old age and was put to rest to relieve them from great suffering, experiencing regret is natural. However, wishing that things would have happened differently does not have to lead to the burden of guilt. By choosing to accept even the most difficult reality, one may be free to focus on the positive aspects of the pet's life. Remembering the good times instead of dwelling on regrets will give the pet an honorable place in your memories.
Memorials of Love
Establish special reminders of a pet's loving place in the family history. While burying an animal in the back yard is not always possible or lawful, planting a tree or erecting a memorial stone is a beautiful alternative. Many veterinary hospitals can refer clients to a pet cremation service that will take care of the details and supply you with a permanent reminder of the precious gift of life.
A more soothing way to memorialize a beloved pet is to place a toy or statue bearing the pet's likeness in his or her old favorite spot. A cute stuffed toy cat or dog sitting at the foot of the bed can bring sweet smiles and recall a dozen special memories. Hanging pictures or making scrapbook pages in memory of pets can keep the happy memories alive for years.
Closure For The Hurting Heart
Like any wound, emotional hurts take time to heal. It could be days or even years before the feelings of loss diminish under the joys of sweet memories. In the meantime, doing something in honor of the lost pet helps nurse a hurting heart into good health. The ability to do something special for the pet even after his or her life is over gives a productive vent to the barrage of feelings associated with death. Even if no physical memorial is made in a pet's honor, recalling cherished memories and pleasant times with past pets is a priceless gift that will last a lifetime.
Open Your Home
Sometimes the greatest honor that can be done a special pet is keeping a place open in your heart and home for another pet. Wait for just the right animal to come along, and you will have a living reminder of the beloved past pet, as well as an unique new friend to share the joys of life and love with.
About the author:
As the daughter of a veterinarian, Lindsey Meier has had the privilege of caring for and loving a vast variety of pets. From dogs and cats to horses, birds, alligators, birds, bunnies, poultry, crayfish, and beloved crabs, fish, pigs, and goats, Lindsey has experienced the gifts of life as well as the painful deaths of precious pets countless times.
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